Rumor Mill & Peanut Gallery Please Sit Down

Can I be real with you for a moment? Completely honest and transparent? Locally there has come to light a particularly scandalous matter, even in this day and age. I see people posting about this. People who have cursory interactions and relationships with those involved. This event has been the talk of the town, the rumor mill and peanut gallery churning out misinformation and gossip. Almost as if the suffering of others only adds to the delight of the rumor mill. I can almost see their eyes glistening with the revelation of more supposed details, each more forbidden than the last, their palettes for drama slobbering over the dying carcasses of families once vibrant with life, their almost zeal at watching the death throes of important relationships.

The details are not important. It’s not my point. Has it ever occurred to anyone that we are taking about people? Actual people? Real relationships? And if you are so inclined to pass condemnation or pick a side, what of the families involved? Let’s say 4 people all make a decision, albeit an absurdly illogical and morally corrupt one. Would anyone ever think that those would be the only 4 people who would be affected by that decision? Of course not! Perhaps the 4 never thought through the consequences of their decision or maybe they minimized it. That absolves no one from guilt. But the families who did not make the choice, who were unaware, they do not deserve the prying eye of the public dissecting every movement and questioning what it all may mean. They deserve to be shielded from the scrutiny and judgment of strangers. They deserve privacy to handle their private matters. They deserve dignity.

But let me go on the record and say this unequivocally: no matter how another has sinned against you, you are not less. You are not less valuable. You are not less worthy of love. You are not less of a person. You are not less attractive. You are not less than any other. Your worth is not determined by any other human being. You hold intrinsic value. Value that cannot be counted nor compared. Because you are you. And the most amazing thing about you is that no one else is you. That is your strength. I, for one, will not be weighing in on what any party involved should do. My opinion matters diddly squat. As does everyone else’s. But please, friends, some things are just not for public consumption. And this happens to be one of those things.

It’s been so long since I have published a blog post. I’ve been journaling and working through so many things. Maybe you already know but  my then 15 year old son Miles was tragically  killed in a car accident on November 16, 2015. It’s been almost 2 years already. I’ve used Facebook as a platform into my heart, the heart of a mother who lost a child. In real time. I was honest and transparent. At least as much as I could be while still keeping private things private and honoring my husband’s and son’s privacy. My goal was to let the world in just a bit to understand what someone may feel during such a trying time. Because I thought if people knew how it really was then they could be better friends, better support, be more effective. But now I believe it’s time to begin writing here. I will begin by posting a Facebook status of mine  from earlier this week because that is still on my heart and rattling around in my brain. Until next time, my friends...